My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize