the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
tonight lets celebrate not being married
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
