hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Buhtt sex?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
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