woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
