I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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