It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I could fuck to npr.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
