Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
