so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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