Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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