I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
