she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
