I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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