So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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