people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
