So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
