Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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