I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
