Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
