Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
