but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
