that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
