I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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