Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Randomize
