you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
