I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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