I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
