well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
