he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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