I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize