I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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