My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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