I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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