There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
it's like heaven, but drunker
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
