ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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