Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
