the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
