Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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