What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
