i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
