I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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