S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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