my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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