I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
my being single is dangerous.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
