I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
