She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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