i think i have herpe
just one?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
