watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
