Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
