I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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