You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
