ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize